Stylish Events

Image from the knot {photograph by Whitney Fox}

My fiancé and I picked out our own vows from a ceremony planning book. We didn’t write them ourselves, because we found vows that we felt encompassed our relationship and how we felt about each other. If you’re brave enough to write your own vows here are 10 tips:

1. Ask your officiant if you can write your own vows. Some religions and officiants require you to say specific vows, so you’ll want to make sure you can do this ahead of time.

2. Decide with your fiancé if you’re going to write them together and say the same vows or write them separately.

3. Decide together if you’re going to share your vows {if writing them separately} before the big day.

4. If you’re shy, you don’t have to say incredibly personal things in your vows. Write those things in a note to give your fiancé before the ceremony.

5. Decide on an outline together, so the vows are similar if you’re writing them separately.

6. Discuss the tone that you want to portray with your vows. Do you want them to be romantic, funny, or a combination?

7. Determine a length for your vows. Keep it under one minute.

8. Think about how your fiancé makes you feel and why you love to be around him when you’re writing your vows.

9. If you’re having trouble writing your vows, think about what you miss about your fiancé the most when you’re apart. How has your relationship grown? Why did you fall in love with your fiancé? Free write for ten or fifteen minutes and then take pieces from your writing and write your vows.

10. Review your vows with your officiant – most will require this if you’re writing your own.

No Comments | In: Ceremony, Tip of the Day | tags: officiant, wedding ceremony, writing your vows. | #

Image from the knot {Photograph by Charlotte Jenks-Lewis}

If you’re a couple who comes from different religions, you have to work together to figure out what type of ceremony you want to have. Do you both want pieces of your religions incorporated? Do you want to have two different officiants – one from each religion or have a nonreligious officiant? Discuss it with your partner first and then discuss it with both families. See what aspects of each religion are important to each family and decide what you want to include.

If you want to honor both religions and don’t want to have two officiants at the same ceremony, you can have two ceremonies. They could take place on the same day or on separate days. Whatever you decide, keep everyone in loop by describing the traditions and religious aspects in your ceremony programs. Do what feels right to you and your future spouse while honoring each family and you won’t go wrong.

No Comments | In: Ceremony, Tip of the Day | tags: mixed faith ceremony, officiant, wedding ceremony. | #